EXPECTATIONS
Card 1 of 4 • Setting the Foundation
If you haven't said it out loud, don't assume they know it.
WHAT IT IS
Expectations are the foundation of every working relationship. Three lanes: what you need FROM someone (performance + behavior), what they can expect FROM you, and what you build TOGETHER. All three lanes must be active - most leaders only use one.
🔍 LEADER LENS
- Set expectations in all 3 lanes, not just what you need from them
- Cover both performance AND behavior, not just tasks
- Revisit expectations when roles, priorities, or people change
- Co-create the WE lane don't just hand it down
👤 INDIVIDUAL CONTRIBUTOR LENS
- Ask what success looks like, don't assume
- Share what you need to do your best work
- Name your non-negotiables: it's clarity, not complaining
- Bring WE lane ideas
✅ GREEN FLAGS (Doing it right)
- Expectations are named, not assumed
- Both people know what 'done' looks like
- You revisit expectations when things change
- The WE lane is a real conversation, not a formality
🚩 RED FLAGS (Watch out)
- Surprised when someone misses your standard
- Expectations only flow in one direction
- Set once and never revisited
- Performance is addressed, but behavior never is
Self-Check
"Have I named this expectation out loud or am I assuming they already know it?"
Coaching Tip
Write down your top 3 expectations of your team or leader. Then ask: have I actually said these out loud?
ACCOUNTABILITY
Card 2 of 4 • Owning the Outcome
It's about growth, not just consequences.
WHAT IT IS
Holding yourself and others to the agreed-upon standards. True accountability is an act of care, helping people reach their potential rather than punishing them for falling short.
🔍 LEADER LENS
- Address the gap between expectation and reality immediately
- Hold yourself to the same (or higher) standard
- Focus on the behavior/outcome, not the character
👤 INDIVIDUAL CONTRIBUTOR LENS
- Ask for feedback before it's given
- Own your mistakes without defensiveness
- Hold your peers accountable, don't wait for the leader to do it
✅ GREEN FLAGS (Doing it right)
- Conversations happen early, before frustration builds
- Mistakes are treated as learning opportunities
- People take genuine ownership of their outcomes
🚩 RED FLAGS (Watch out)
- Different rules apply to different people
- Ignoring poor behavior because they are a high-performer
- Waiting for formal performance reviews to address issues
Self-Check
"Am I avoiding a tough conversation because I want to be liked, or having it because I want them to grow?"
Coaching Tip
Identify one conversation you've been avoiding. Draft your opening sentence today and schedule the talk within 48 hours.
ADVOCACY
Card 3 of 4 • Championing Your People
Speaking up for them in rooms they aren't in.
WHAT IT IS
Actively fighting for your team's success, well-being, and resources. Proof you view your people as humans first. It means being their loudest champion when they succeed and their shield when they stumble.
🔍 LEADER LENS
- Remove roadblocks that slow your team down
- Secure the resources they need to win
- Provide "air cover" when they take calculated risks
👤 INDIVIDUAL CONTRIBUTOR LENS
- Share your career goals so your leader knows what to advocate for
- Advocate for your peers when they do great work
- Celebrate team wins publicly and authentically
✅ GREEN FLAGS (Doing it right)
- Team feels supported, protected, and seen
- Resources provided match the expectations set
- Praise is public, correction is private
🚩 RED FLAGS (Watch out)
- Taking credit for your team's hard work
- Throwing the team under the bus to save yourself
- Promising resources or support but never delivering
Self-Check
"How have I actively cleared a path or provided air cover for my team this week?"
Coaching Tip
Find a specific win from someone on your team and highlight it to your own leadership today.
TRUST
Card 4 of 4 • The Balance
The soil where expectations, accountability, and advocacy grow.
WHAT IT IS
Trust is the ultimate currency of leadership. Every kept expectation deposits into the trust account. Every broken one withdraws. Trust is the balance.
🔍 LEADER & 👤 IC LENS
- Don't assume trust is there—earn it consistently
- When trust breaks, name it and repair it directly
✅ GREEN FLAGS (Doing it right)
- People do what they say they'll do
- Trust philosophy is named, not assumed
- Broken trust gets addressed and repaired
- Team gives each other the benefit of the doubt
🚩 RED FLAGS (Watch out)
- Trust is assumed because it's never been tested
- People overpromise and underdeliver consistently
- Broken trust is avoided rather than repaired
- Different rules apply to different people
HOW IT CONNECTS TO THE OTHER THREE
→ Expectations: Every kept expectation deposits into the trust account. Every broken one withdraws. Trust is the balance.
→ Accountability: When accountability is handled with fairness and consistency, it builds trust even when it's uncomfortable.
→ Advocacy: People advocate more freely when they trust the relationship. Trust is the soil advocacy grows in.
→ The WE Lane: Co-created expectations are the highest form of trust-building. They signal: I see you as a partner, not just a resource.
Self-Check
"Have I made my trust philosophy explicit or is my team guessing where they stand with me?"
Coaching Tip
Ask: what's one kept promise that would meaningfully build trust with someone on your team right now? Make that promise this week. Then keep it.
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